How to Slow Down and Live More Mindfully
Do you ever have the feeling of constantly being rushed? You have things you need to mark off your checklist, errands to run, responsibilities to fulfill, and a never-ending slate of things to do. Even with a busy schedule, you can learn to slow it all down a bit.
Learning to slow down in the fast-paced modern world can be difficult. But it’s one of the most powerful changes I’ve made in my own life, both in terms of general wellbeing and my mindfulness practice. I understand a life of true renunciation, such as monasticism, just isn’t in the cards for many of us currently.
Additionally, the idea of slowing down can bring up fears of reducing productivity. What we can do is find ways to slow down the mind and our days. In fact, I find that slowing down actually makes me more productive with the tasks I need to complete.
I want to start by offering a bit of perspective with my experience of slowing down. I’ll then cover the benefits of slowing down, what I actually mean by the term “slowing down,” and a few practical ways you can begin to investigate this in your own life.
My Experience with Slowing Down
As many readers of the blog and listeners of the podcast know, I struggled with the fast-paced life I was living in the United States. Back in 2018, we sold everything we owned and moved to Mexico. This slowed our lives down substantially. We worked less and slowed down with the Mexican beach culture.
Despite less activities, responsibilities, and daily tasks, I came to realize that the stress, rushing, and sense of urgency was still there in many ways. This is when I began turning more deeply to teachings of Thich Nhat Hanh and Sayadaw U Tejaniya, looking at how I can bring mindfulness to everyday life.
What I’ve found is that we can do both. We can benefit from literally slowing down our physical activity AND slowing down the mental activity. They go hand in hand. If we just physically slow down or take on less responsibility, it doesn’t guarantee we’ll find the relief from stress and burnout that we are looking for. In order to truly slow down, we need to learn to create internal conditions.
What It Means to Slow Down
When I talk about slowing down, you may have images of walking more slowly during your day or not speeding through the dishes. Yes, these are wonderful things that can support our wellbeing profoundly. But slowing down is more than just physically moving more slowly.
To slow down, we need to stop rushing through life. Although we have a tendency to place the blame on external circumstances, the mind’s relationship to experience is what is most important here. I am not here to tell you how to organize your life, nor an expert on your responsibilities and life circumstances.
Instead, I want to focus on what slowing down means to me. Slowing down to me means being present through experience. Think about this for a moment. When you are rushing, where is your focus? Usually on the future, right? The attention rests with completing the task and the next thing that needs to be done, and a sense of urgency arises.
As we stop rushing, our attention can rest on what we are actually doing. Rather than focusing on the future, awareness rests in the present. It may seem like a wild claim, but resting in the present moment takes away this sense of urgency and allows us to be more at ease. In this sense, slowing down involves creating space to be present rather than rushing through life.
Ways You Can Begin Slowing Down
So, how can we actually do this? Below are some tips and methods I’ve used in my own life and in my mindfulness coaching practice. Some are quite literal ways we can slow down, while others focus on this aspect of presence and awareness during the day.
Single-Task
This is one of my favorite ways to practice mindfulness in everyday life. It goes a bit against the norm of society these days, and takes some work. Research shows multitasking increases cognitive load, making us feel more tired by tasks. Yet we all do it. We walk and listen to a podcast, drive and listen to music, or watch TV and scroll social media.
To slow down, try sticking to one thing at a time. I recommend picking one place you do this in your life regularly. If you are often on your phone while watching TV, pick one or the other. It may be hard at first. Boredom may arise, or a desire for more stimulation. But single-tasking can give us a bit of reprieve from the doing.
Do Something Slowly
This is perhaps the most obvious suggestion on this list, but it’s worth investigating. We so often rush through things, but why? We rush to get more done and have more free time. But when we slow down, we actually create the calm we’re looking for without looking ahead to the future.
Again, my recommendation is to pick one activity to begin. It might be washing the dishes, walking the dog, making lunch for your kids, or showering. Whatever it is, move more slowly. It may take more than one try, but eventually you can find ease in these moments. Rather than seeing it as a task to be completed, it becomes a practice in itself.
Create Pauses in Your Day
This is another one that is related to literally slowing down, but also relates to mentally slowing down. When we have busy days or weeks, we often forget to take time for ourselves. And we have grand ideas of what it means to do so. In reality, you don’t need much to make a difference.
You might use a mindfulness reminder, or awareness trigger. The idea is fairly simple. Any time your trigger happens, you pause for a few mindful breaths. You might use the sound of a phone ringing, walking through a doorway, or walking. Use these brief pauses to take some breaths, return awareness to the present moment, check in with urgency, etc.
Use Habitual Phone Time
We all habitually reach for our phones more than we realize. Take a look next time you’re in line at the grocery store. How many people waiting are looking at their phones? We don’t need to throw away our phones to work with this. We can find the Middle Way.
A great way to start here is by putting the phone in another room. When it’s out of sight, we reach for it less. The benefit here is we reduce stimulation. We find some slowness by just being rather than scrolling on our phones. Use this time to breathe, check in, or simply do nothing!
Practice Mindful Eating
Mindful eating is a fantastic way to slow down in daily life. We all eat regularly, so why not use it as a practice? We rarely are truly present for the experience of eating. We rush through it, multitask, or are otherwise occupied.
You can investigate a traditional, slow mindful eating practice. You also might just eat and be present. Don’t watch anything, don’t listen to anything. Just sit and enjoy eating. Create some space for your nervous system to relax, don’t rush, and tune into how it actually feels to eat.
Take a Mindful Walk
Although we think of meditation as something we do still and seated, there are actually many ways to practice moving meditation. One way is the mindful walk. You can do a more formal walking meditation, or take a casual stroll mindfully.
Most of us move during our days. You might walk the dog, walk from the bus to work, or walk around the store while buying groceries. Use this time as an opportunity to be mindful. Feel the feet as they come into contact with the ground, feel the body move through space, and watch what grabs your attention.
Befriend Boredom
If we are to slow down, we have to accept that we are going to feel the feeling of boredom. Especially when we first begin slowing down, it is natural. As we lessen stimulation and seek to rest in the present moment, the mind may experience what can only be described as boredom or even restlessness.
Boredom in meditation is quite common, and boredom in daily life off the cushion is no different. Here’s the truth: by allowing ourselves to feel the boredom, we build resilience to it. Instead of distracting yourself with more stimulus, be with it. Investigate it, and look at it with curiosity. What does it actually feel like in the mind and body? With curiosity, boredom becomes much more tolerable.
Recognize Rushing
Any time we are trying to cultivate a quality, we can benefit from recognizing when that quality is not present. In the case of slowing down, some mindfulness of when we’re rushing is key. By tuning into the feeling of rushing, we know when to take a pause and slow down.
You might notice a feeling in the mind or body when there’s urgency. It may feel like tension, a racing heart, or anxiety. You might respond with some self-compassion, simple mindfulness, and/or slowing down. Be grateful; every time you recognize the feeling of rushing you are cultivating mindfulness and familiarizing yourself with it. You will be able to see it more easily in the future.
Meditate
Is it not obvious I am going to suggest meditating? Of course I am. I recommend starting a daily meditation habit. Mindfulness gives us an ability to move more slowly and with presence. Even a few minutes a day can help make mindfulness come more naturally and regularly in your life.
If you’re new to meditation, you can try my Month of Mindfulness program. It’s completely free, and offers 30 days of guided meditations. The meditations are only 3-6 minutes. The intention was to create a program for beginners to learn different techniques and build the habit.
Making Slowing Down a Habit
One of the most important factors when it comes to mindfulness is patience. These things take time. When we first begin slowing down, it can feel boring, restless, or even perhaps irritating. But over time, we adjust and begint o find the joy and ease in it.
The best tip I have for you if you want to make slowing down more of a habit in your life is to find ways to slow down consistently. You don’t need to move like a sloth through your day. But find a way to slow down every day at least in one way. It may be a meal, a walk, or by intentionally single-tasking. Give it a shot for a few weeks and see how much more naturally it comes.
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Matthew Sockolov is a Buddhist meditation teacher who trained at Spirit Rock Meditation Center in Woodacre, California. Completing the Dharma Leader training program in 2017, Matthew was given power to teach in the Insight Meditation tradition by Jack Kornfield, Kittisaro, Thanissara, and others. You can learn more about Matthew here.